By Jake Ho on Feb 23, 2015 06:55 am
WHITE PLAINS, NY: In a shrewd but brilliant marketing move last week, Hoveranywhere announced plans to sell thousands of “smaller-sized” pediatric power chairs. The chairs are modeled after the adult Hoverround, but will come in three scaled down sizes and eight different colors to accommodate the rapidly expanding population of morbidly obese kids. John Rossman, CEO of Hoveraround, was reached by Gomerblog for comments. “If it is socially acceptable for obese but able-bodied adults to avoid walking and instead ride a motorized wheelchair, then why shouldn’t the same practice be acceptable for obese children?” he reasoned. “Walking should be a thing of the past. Why should us humans continue walking like our cave man ancestors, when we have the capability to travel in comfort?” The chairs will retail for about $3500. Each chair comes equipped with a 16″ LCD monitor, Bose surround sound speakers, WiFi capability, a bin for storage of deep-fried carbohydrate snacks, a cooler for calorie-dense beverages, a toilet, an X-Box (TM), disability paperwork, and a lifetime exercise excuse.
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